Everywhere I go, except the one place I could really use it (work), I am in a music video. The music is so loud that I can lip synch along, the tunes are so top 40 that it makes perfect sense that promotion would include an actual music video.
Cut to me, sitting with books in front of me at a local coffee shop. Alanis Morisette is crooning about a jagged little pill, that drugged out yoga freak with the hippy hair. I stand, singing along, not because I want to, but because the music is loud and I certainly can't think about, or concentrate on anything else, so I decide to make the most out of it, and play along with the music video game.
Cut to me eating a Panini, crouched in the corner like a wounded animal, looking resentfully at the large speaker over my head. Suddenly I stand, imagining myself on stage doing choreographed dance moves with Justin Timberlake.
Cut to me gazing at a top three times too small for me in a clothing store. Suddenly, I pull my hair brush outta my purse as a handy stand-in microphone and I start cat walking in circles around the clothing wracks belting passionately "you don't know my name . . . baby, baby, BAAAABBBYYY"
Why does god want me to be in a music video all the time? (Btw, God, this is a direct question. I'm not just cc'ing you on this). I'm just trying to be a freaking normal person while eating and studying and reading and brooding over my inconsequential and privileged problems- like, why can't I go home right NOW, and download the new Kaskade from itunes? Instead I'm hear in pukey workville with files coming outta my ass. Whah. And my coffee's cold. And here at work, I could really use that music video.
EVERYBODY'S WORKIN FOR THE WEEKEND.
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